I'm a Green, You're a Blue

There is a lot of training centered around naming other people's personalities and then using those categories to communicate better, read people, work together or build relationships. Sometimes these approaches take the form of being a color or giving your personality a name. They all fall under the broad category of personality typology. Personality typology aims at helping us understand our differences and how we can use that knowledge to relate more effectively.

While I think it is valuable for people to understand that others have different communication styles, perspectives or approaches I think this methodology only addresses a part of what true communication or relationship building is all about. Personality typology can be a great conversation starter but it benefits from adding a couple of components.

It helps to start by not forgetting the things we have in common. Personality typology tends to focus on differences. You're this and I'm that. This is great for pointing out differences but less effective for bringing people together. An approach that works to bring people together is to focus on the things they share and build on those.

Another key element to pay less attention to is labeling. Labeling tends to put people in neat categories that don't really reflect who they are at a deeper level. So we've gone through our training and now we can all walk around and point at each other as being this or that. That's great but it doesn't get to the crux of understanding another human being. Labeling can be effective to point out obvious differences but a deeper understanding of what really makes people tick can give you far greater insight.

So what can companies and individuals do to really bring their people together and help them get along famously? It takes a change of focus. Think about the following ideas and how they might help your employees (or you) create stronger connections.

1. Focus on the things people have in common.
2. Practice active listening to learn about others.
3. Spend time learning about others by listening.
4. Forget labels and find out what people really love doing.
5. Build empathy by creating conversation groups.
6. Ask open-ended questions to learn about others.
7. See the world through someone else's eyes.
8. Don't react to differences, take it as an opportunity to learn.
9. Practice collaborative problem solving skills.
10. Celebrate people regularly.
    

Ask yourself how effectively you practice these ten key skills. Successful people and companies understand the value of stepping outside themselves and learning about others. Getting along with others is not so much about the things the keep us apart, it's about the things that can bring us together.

Regards,

Guy
Team Building and Soft Skills Training